Long Weekend

Monday June 19th 2006 10:43 PM PST

Last Thursday i got up at 4AM. I got ready and got out the door to drive to LAX to catch a 6:15 flight to Denver. Even at 5AM i hit gridlock on the 105. I should have known the rest of the day was going to be just the same. After finally getting to the airport, even with plenty of time to make my flight, i find out its been cancelled. Not really cancelled, but there is no longer any kind of 6:15 flight on their schedule. I have to wait in line (after initially waiting in line already) to get on another flight. I manage to get on an 8:15 flight that will still get me to Denver to make my connection, and I'll be in Des Moines by 3:30. I get to the gate and sit directly in front of the counter (which might have been the smartest thing i did all day). Its still a long time before the 8:15 flight, so i start to read the book i've brought, Douglas Coupland's microserfs. The airplane arrives, and unloads its passengers, and everything seems to be going fine. Then they announce that the flight has a mechanical problem and they'll know more at 9AM. Meanwhile, if you have a connection flight that you need to make, come up to the counter to book something else. So i step into line 2nd person back. All i had to do was stand up. In about 15 seconds, there are 45 people in line. I get to the counter and the woman there (who is already pissed off for some reason) tells me, there is no problem with my connection, and she's going to recommend that i just wait it out and don't try for another flight. This is the last time i listen to a United Airlines gate attendant. I sit down like the little compliant dipshit that i am, and take the position of being screwed.

at 9, they say they'll know more at 9:30. At 10 they say they don't know anything, but they'll know more at 11. At 12 they say they still don't know, but they're going to get another airplane to switch out with the fucked up one. At 1 they say they'll be departing at 2. At 2:30 we finally get in the air.

If i'd done nothing but say to the gate attendant originally... Look just put me on the standby list for the next Denver flight. Fuckin dipshit me for not doing it.

I get to Denver and i've already missed 2 connection flights. During the time sitting with my thumb up my ass in LAX i actually got a boarding pass for the flight that i knew i most likely would be on.... the 7:14 from Denver to Des Moines. So i'm safe, i'll be in Des Moines at around 9:30 or 10 and i'll still make Doug's bachelor party. YEAH RIGHT!

The plane again arrives and everybody gets off. This time we start boarding the plane, and i'm actually walking through the door to walk down the jetway. Above my head is the red LED sign that says the flight is departing at 7:14. AS i approach it changes to 8... you've gotta be kidding me. I get on the plane. 2 minutes later they stop boarding people. They announce that a door seal where the baggage goes has come off and they need to replace it. They'll be taking off at 8. I sit and read some more. Then they continue to board people about 20 minutes later. They pull away from the gate at 8 and start to taxi. Then we stop again. The pilot comes on and announces that the entire airport is now closed down due to violent wind shears. We have to wait it out.

We sit on the runway for an hour being blown around by the wind. And its not fuckin joke, the 737 is getting moved around A LOT. So now i'm really not too happy about taking off anyway, but finally after sitting ANOTHER hour on the runway, we finally start moving again. We sit waiting in line for another half hour, and then finally take off in VERY HIGH WINDS.

I fuckin HATE flying, and now i hate it even more. This is by far the worst flight i've ever been on. The plane just gets tossed around like a rag doll. So now i'm holding on for my life, i'm already nine hours late, and I've still gotta drive Iowa roads once i get to Des Moines. We touch down right around 12:15 and i find myself in a airport smaller than burbank. The car rental lady is the nicest person i've talked to all day, and she takes all off 2 minutes to completely set me up with everything in need. I'm ready to go before the first bag comes off the plane. And then the last bag comes off, and mine is nowhere to be seen. Figures. I stand there just pissed off and start walking over to the attendant, and finally notice my bag sitting on a cart in a corner on the other side of baggage claim. I laugh because i know its been sitting here since 3PM. They probably put it on the first flight out of LAX, and I was the dipshit waiting for a broken plane.

I get outside and GAWD DAMN its humid. Its still close to 90 outside and i can tell its just going to be a HOT weekend. I call Doug, and his cell phone rings.

and rings and rings and rings.

hmmmmmm. I call Jen. I tell her i'm finally off the plane. I call Doug again. nothing.

I call the other number i've got for Jeremy's cell phone (Kristi's brother). Still nothing.

I pull out the GPS and track in, and get ready to drive to Pella. No use in my trying to find them in Des Moines. They could be at ANY strip club in the entire city, and I'm too tired to look. I head out and drive another hour on country highways to finally get to Pella. I check into the royal Amsterdam Hotel (yes Pella is a little Dutch community, but no red light district) and I call Jen again to say good night. Its now 2:30AM.

ok, that was a rant... i'll finish the better part of the story later.

Comments:

At least they didn't lose your luggage! AirTran lost our luggage THREE TIMES in ONE WEEK! We got it back the day before we went home, from a 6 day vacation.

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Dave, that really sucks! I hope we made the rest of the weekend better. It was so good to see you guys - I wish we could have hung out more! Doug and I will definitely try to make a trip out to visit for that 3 month time period you offered to let us stay........ or, you know, if that's too long, we could cut it down to 2 months, 25 days, or something. I'm excited for your next entry though - interesting to see the weekend from another person's point of view, especially when I can't remember much of it myself!

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